The Truth About GRITS!

The honest to goodness truth about Grits.



That's the food, "Grits". Not "G.R.I.T.S", which everyone should know is the acronym for Girls Raised In The South.



True Grits

What Are Grits?
Some folks believe grits are grown on bushes and are harvested by midgets by shaking the bushes after spreading sheets around them. Many people think grits are made from ground up bits of white corn. These are lies spread by Communists and terrorists. Nothing as good as a Grits can be made from corn. Research suggests that the mysterious Manna that God rained down upon the Israelites during their time in the Sinai Desert was most likely Grits. Critics disagree, stating that there is no record of biscuits, butter, salt, and red eye gravy raining down from the sky, and that God would not punish his people by forcing them to eat Grits without these key ingredients.

How Grits are Formed:
Grits are formed deep underground under intense heat and pressure. It takes over 1000 years to form a single Grit. Most of the world's grit mines are in Georgia , and are guarded day and night by armed guards and attack dogs. Harvesting the Grit is a dangerous occupation, and many Grit miners lose their lives each year so that Grits can continue to be served morning after morning for breakfast--not that having Grits for lunch and dinner is out of the question.

Yankees have attempted to create a synthetic Grits. They call them Cream of Wheat. As far as we can tell, the key ingredients of Cream of Wheat are Elmer's Glue and shredded Styrofoam. These synthetic grits have also been shown to cause nausea, and can leave you unable to have children.

Historical Grits:
As mentioned earlier, the first known mention of the Grits was by the Ancient Israelites in the Sinai Desert. After that, Grits were not heard from for another 1000 years. Grits were used during this time only during secret religious ceremonies, and were kept from the public. The next mention of Grits was found amidst the ruins of the ancient city of Pompeii in a woman's personal diary discovered in the seat of an old sedan. The woman's name was Herculania Jemimana, who was known as Aunt Jemima to her friends.

The Ten Commandments of Grits:
I. Thou shalt not put syrup on thy Grits
II.Thou shalt not eat thy Grits with a spoon or knife
III.Thou shalt not eat Cream of Wheat and call it Grits, for this is blasphemy
IV. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's Grits
V.Thou shalt use only Salt, Butter, and red eye gravy as toppings for thy Grits
VI. Thou shalt not eat Instant Grits
VII. Thou shalt not put ketchup on thy Grits
VIII. Thou shalt not put margarine on thy Grits.
IX. Thou shalt not eat toast with thy Grits, only biscuits made from scratch .
X. Thou shalt eat grits on the Sabbath for this is manna from heaven.

How to Cook Grits:
For one serving of Grits: Boil 1.5 cups of water with salt and a little butter. Add 5 Tbsp of Grits. Reduce to a simmer and allow the Grits to
soak up all the water. When a pencil stuck into the grits stands alone, they are done. That's all there is to cooking grits.
How to make red eye gravy: Fry salt cured country ham in cast-iron pan. Remove the ham when done and add coffee to the gravy and simmer for several minutes. Great on grits and biscuits.

How to Eat Grits:
Immediately after removing your grits from the stove top, add a generous portion of butter or red eye gravy. Do NOT use low-fat butter.
The butter should cause the Grits to turn a wondrous shade of yellow. Hold a banana or a yellow rain slicker next to your Grits; if the colors match, you have the correct amount of butter. In lieu of butter, pour a generous helping of red eye gravy on your
grits. Be sure to pour enough to have some left for sopping up with your biscuits. Use biscuits made from scratch. Never, ever substitute canned or store-bought biscuits for the real thing because they can cause cancer, tooth decay and impotence. Next, add salt. The correct ratio of Grit to Salt is 10:1 Therefore for every 10 grits, you should have 1 grain of salt. Now begin eating your grits. Always use a fork, never a spoon, to eat Grits. Your grits should be thick enough so they do not run through the tines of the fork. The correct beverage to serve with Grits is black coffee. DO NOT use cream or, heaven forbid, Skim Milk. Your grits should rarely be eaten in a bowl because Yankees will think it's Cream of Wheat.

Ways to Eat Leftover Grits:
Leftover grits are extremely rare and may only be a rumor. Spread them in the bottom of a casserole dish, Cover and place them in the refrigerator overnight. The Grits will congeal into a gelatinous mass. Next morning, slice the Grits into squares and fry them in 1/2' of cooking oil and butter until they turn a golden brown. Many people are tempted to pour syrup onto Grits served this way. This is, of course, unacceptable but delicious.

BLESSING BEFORE EATING GRITS

May the Lord bless these grits,
May Yankees never get the recipe,
May I eat grits each day while living,
And may I die while eating grits.

AMEN

Now that STORY could only have come from someone in Texas.

My sis-in-law says Shrimp and Grits is very tasty. I will NOT knowingly eat grits.

Tater

Tater: You do not know what you are missing. Southerner by the Grace of God

I don't WANT to know what I'm missing. Born a Yankee.

Every holiday, DW makes Cheese Grits. Uses a lot of garlic as well. It's a wonderful souflfe, if you like cheese and garlic. When DW finds the recipe, I'll post it.

Anyone who can stomach cream of wheat can surely eat grits.

My sis-in-law loves Cheese Grits. She probably makes them, she's a marvelous cook, but thankfully she doesn't make them when we are there. I don't eat Cream of Wheat either.

Scruffy says if everybody liked grits, those grits mines wouldn't be able to keep up with the demand.

Tater

I was once on the road from Langley VA to Washington DC. We stopped for breakfast and I ordered "a grit".

Cardinal_Bill wrote:I ordered "a grit".

I work for Post Foods and we make the fake grit cereal called Grapenuts and no there is no grapes in it. But I do know 1 thing and if you put too much into a bowl of milk I can garrenty that you will spend the next 30 minutes eating it.

Grapenuts are fake grits? I really don't see the comparison. I LOVE Grapenuts BTW, and appreciate that your company makes it for me to enjoy. I put milk on it and wait 20-30 minutes before eating it. Yummy!!!!!!!!!!!

Tater

We are the last plant to make it (BTW it starts out as 2000 lb dough tubs and then made into loaves) and it is now our biggest run for now I hope the enconomy doesn't get any worse for we are getting down to almost nothing. The plant used to make everything from grapenuts and rasin bran to some presweets honeycomb and waffle crisp and some selects now we are struggling to keep it running 5 days a week it is getting real scary I was working some weekends but not anymore. I sure hope things start turning around and I can pay off the cat in time to retire when I had planned to.

I don't want to read that. I'll go out and buy some Grapenuts - several boxes - and I hope they aren't my last.

Tater

darn! Grapenuts AND Raisin Bran. Two of my favorite cereals, actually the only two cold cereals I eat. The other two are oatmeal, old fashioned kind, and Ralston, 100% Whole Wheat. Ralston is hard to find and I'm wondering if that Krusteaz wheat is close.

Maybe the only way you'll know is to try it. Even if it isn't the same, you might like it anyway. Do they make a real small container to try?

I am not a grits aficionado, my wife is, but the best grits I ever ate were made by a Yankee (like me). Go figure.

Cardinal_Bill wrote:darn! Grapenuts AND Raisin Bran. Two of my favorite cereals, actually the only two cold cereals I eat. The other two are oatmeal, old fashioned kind, and Ralston, 100% Whole Wheat. Ralston is hard to find and I'm wondering if that Krusteaz wheat is close.

We are part Ralcorp we run several other brands they might be close slight formula change.

Tater,,,,, If you've never had Grits and scrambled eggs mixed together with some real Butter, and a couple of smoked link sausage.......... Good lord ,,, its the best.....
I used to love it when my mom would make it for dinner.
for most of my childhood until she booted me from the nest at 18, My mom would cook grits and eggs for breakfast every morning 7days a week. If nothing else she knew she could catch me in the mornings and fill me up, so I wouldn't starve to death before she saw me again the next morning.
Even when I'd wake up with a hang over from partying with my friends all night,,,,, the smell would roll you out of bed and straight to the table, You might not be able to open your eyes but your hand / mouth/ stomach - cordination would kick in and take over.
If you ever try them and they're made the old fashion way , cooked to perfection,,,,, You'd be hooked forever.

Phillip: I 2nd your post all the way. Been there and done it. All I can add is Poor Tater never tried Southern Grits. Jim

If you ever try them and they're made the old fashion way , cooked to perfection,,,,, You'd be hooked forever.

That's what they told me about liver.

My Grandma was from around Quitman Ga.,and that woman could cook a mess of grits and eggs that would knock your socks off.We had beacon with ours.

No such thing as bad grits, but instant comes close.





Stone ground grits are the best!!

TC

Quaker Instant Grits. That makes perfect sense.

Aunt Jemima Old Fashioned Grits. 20 minutes to cook. Makes perfect sense.

Quoted from My Cousin Vinny "No self respectin Southerner would make instant grits".

BobnPi wrote:
Quoted from My Cousin Vinny "No self respectin Southerner would make instant grits".

AMEN!!

I'll bet a lot of folks base their poor experience on instant. Instant grits should come with a warning label.

TC

After reading all through these posts, I have not seen 1 recipe for grits.

Phillip says with scrambled eggs mixed together with some real Butter, and a couple of smoked link sausage.

But no one say anything else.

So, come on you grit lovers, lets see some recipes......

Here's 4. I can provide a couple more, maybe 100+, with what to do with this spackle.

MMMMM----- Recipe via Meal-Master (tm) v8.05

Title: American Hominy Grits
Categories: Info, Corn
Yield: 1 Servings

1 qt Dried corn
2 qt Water
2 tb Baking soda
2 qt Water
1 ts Salt

Hominy is corn with the hull and germ removed. To help loosen the
hulls wood ash lye is used in commercial processing. Grits are broken
rather than whole grain hominy.

Shell and wash the dried corn. In a large pot add the water, corn and
soda. Soak 12 hours and then bring to a boil. Simmer 3 hours until the
hulls are loose. Drain; rub corn with your hands until the hulls are
removed. Add corn to fresh water with the salt; bring to a boil,
simmer, drain and proceed with any hominy or grits recipe.

Original Source not noted on file
From: Ron Curtis Date: 03-05-96

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Title: Basic Grits
Categories: Starch, American, Corby
Yield: 1 Servings

1 qt Water
2 tb Butter
Salt to taste
1 c Stone-ground whole-grain
- grits

THE BEST GRITS

Supermarket grits are processed hominy: corn that's been treated in an
alkaline solution so that the hulls and germ float to the surface.
Thus bleached, the corn is dried, enriched (some of the nutrients
lost in the processing are added back in) and ground--too fine, to my
taste. These tasteless, ashen grits are served as a matter of course
in countless restaurants and homes throughout the South. It's no
wonder outsiders don't like them.

When early colonists arrived in the South, the Native Americans made
hominy by soaking their corn in a solution of lye made from wood
ashes. Ashen grits were made to preserve the grain through the winter
and spring, when temperatures often stayed in the 70s and 80s. This
processing was of course unnecessary up north.

When I went looking for great grits, I tried more than two dozen mills
before I found one that could consistently provide coarse-ground,
whole-grain grits (see Ingredients and Sources). I now sell tons of
the best grits I've ever eaten. They taste like freshly ground corn
because they are just that; when cooked, they resemble creamed fresh
corn, but are starchier. They can be used just like pasta or rice.
Not only local home cooks and restaurateurs, but also cooks
throughout the country have added real grits to their menus, so that
old southern favorites like Lowcountry shrimp and grits have
reentered the culinary vernacular as if they had never been missing.

Some people cook their grits for a long, long time. It's true that the
longer they cook, the creamier they become. You can put them in a slow
cooker overnight, and they'll be delicious. But you can easily cook
grits in less than 30 minutes if you're willing to watch the pot and
stir occasionally. Cooked grits can then be enriched with egg, poured
into a well-seasoned cast-iron skillet or greased baking pan, and
refrigerated. The chilled grits are then unmolded, cut into portions,
dusted with flour or cornmeal, and pan-fried like polenta.

Grits invite a host of accompaniments. Any sauce or gravy that you
would put on pasta or rice is ideal. If you plan to serve the grits
plain, a little stock made from trimmings from the main course is a
welcome addition if stirred in near the end of the cooking.
PROCEDURE: Bring the water, butter, and salt to a boil in a stockpot.
Gradually add the grits, return to a boil, then reduce to a simmer.
Cook the grits, stirring occasionally so that that they do not stick
or form a skin, until creamy and done to your liking, about 25
minutes. Many people like to cook them much longer; if you do, you
may have to add more water.

When the grits are almost done, you can turn the pan down to its
lowest setting and cover it while you prepare the rest of the meal.

MM format by Manny Rothstein, 7/15/98.

Recipe-of-the-Month -- April 1995, By Corby Kummer

"From The New Southern Cook", by John Martin Taylor. Bantam, 1995.
Hardcover $27.95.

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Title: Garlic Cheese Grits
Categories: Vegetables, Steven
Yield: 6 servings

Stephen Ceideburg
6 oz Jalapeno cheese
6 oz Garlic cheese
4 c Water
1 ts Salt
1 c Uncooked grits
1/4 c Butter

Slice or tear cheese into small pieces. Bring salted water to boil;
slowly add grits. Bring to a second boil; reduce heat and cook over
medium heat for 4-5 minutes, stirring often.

Add cheese and butter to grits, stirring until melted and blended.
Pour into an ungreased 1 1/2-quart casserole; heat oven to 350
degrees and bake, uncovered, for 30 minutes. Serve with a good steak.

From the Oregonian's FOODday, 1/5/93.

Posted by Stephen Ceideburg

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MMMMM----- Recipe via Meal-Master (tm) v8.05

Title: Garlic Cheese Grits
Categories: Cia, Ffbb, Side dishes, Grits
Yield: 10 Servings

2 qt Water, salted to taste
12 oz Regular grits
6 oz Butter
12 oz Cheddar cheese, sharp,
-grated
12 fl Milk
4 ea Eggs, lightly beaten
2 ea Garlic cloves, minced
1 ts Worcestershire sauce
1/2 ts Tabasco
1 pn Cayenne pepper
2 ts Salt, to taste
1/4 ts Pepper, to taste

1. Bring the water to a rolling boil. Stir in grits; simmer about 30
minutes or until thick. Remove from heat and stir in butter and 10
ounces (300 grams) of cheese until melted.

2. Combine milk, eggs, garlic, Tabasco, Worcestershire sauce, and
cayenne. Add mixture to grits. Add salt and pepper to taste.

3. Pour into buttered dish and top with remaining cheese.

4. Bake in 350øF (175øC) oven until firm, about 1 hour. Let set for
10 minutes before slicing and serving.

Note:
To make souffled grits, separate the eggs. Add the yolks in step 2.
Beat the whites to medium peaks and fold into the grits just before
pouring into a baking dish.
Prepare in individual timbales or souffl dishes.

Recipe by: The New Professional Chef (6th Edition)
: The Culinary Institute of America
: John Wiley & Sons, Inc.
: ISBN: 0-471-28679-6

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Old Fashioned Creamy Grits

Serves 6

2 cups water or more
2 cups milk or more
1 cup stone-ground grits
Kosher salt
1/4 cup heavy cream
2 tablespoons unsalted butter

Heat 2 cups each of water and milk in a heavy-bottomed saucepan until just simmering. While milk is heating, put grits in a large mixing bowl and cover with cool water. Stir grits aggressively so the chaff floats to the top. Skim the surface carefully to remove the chaff. Drain the grits in a fine strainer and stir them into the simmering water and milk. Cook, stirring often to keep them from sticking and scorching, until the grits are tender to the bite and have thickened to the consistency of thick oatmeal. Stone-ground grits often require an hour or more to cook and require the addition of more water and milk during cooking.

Season grits generously with salt and stir in cream and butter. Remove from heat and let rest, covered, until serving. Serve hot.

TC

I watched Paula Deen cook this up today and thought I'd share it.

Mexican Shrimp and Grits

Prep Time:20 min
Inactive Prep Time: --
Cook Time:1 hr 20 min
Level:Easy
Serves:4 to 6 servings.

Ingredients

1 pound medium fresh shrimp, shells left on
6 cups water
1 teaspoon salt, divided
3/4 cup white grits
3 tablespoons butter
6 ounces pepper jack Velveeta cheese, cubed
1/2 pound chorizo sausage, casings removed
3 tablespoons olive oil, optional
1 1/2 cups chopped Vidalia onion
1 red bell pepper, seeded and chopped into 3/4-inch pieces
1 jalapeno pepper, seeded and minced
3 tablespoons all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons heavy whipping cream
1 teaspoon fresh lime juice
2 green onions, chopped, plus more for garnish
3 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro leaves
1/8 teaspoon ground black pepper

Directions

Peel the shrimp and set aside, reserving the shrimp shells.
In a large saucepan, bring the water to a boil over medium heat. Add the shrimp shells and reduce the heat to medium-low. Cook for 15 to 20 minutes, stirring occasionally. Cool the shrimp stock, and strain. Discard the shells.

In a large saucepan, bring 3 1/2 cups shrimp stock and 1/2 teaspoon salt to boil over medium heat. Add the grits, stirring well. Add the butter and stir until melted. Cover, and reduce the heat to low. Cook until thickened, stirring occasionally, about 15 to 20 minutes. Add the Velveeta, and stir until melted. Set aside and keep warm.

In a large skillet over medium heat, add the chorizo and cook until browned and crumbly, about 5 minutes. Remove the chorizo, to a plate or bowl, leaving the drippings in the skillet. Add up to 3 tablespoons olive oil, if necessary. Put the skillet over medium heat, and add the onion. Cook for 4 minutes, then add the red pepper and jalapeno, and cook, stirring frequently, for 3 minutes. Sprinkle with the flour, stirring constantly for 3 minutes. Gradually add 2 cups of shrimp stock, stirring to scrape the bottom of the skillet and to prevent lumps. Stir in the cooked chorizo, and increase the heat to medium-high. Bring the mixture to a boil, and cook until slightly thickened. Add the shrimp, and cook until they turn pink, about 2 to 3 minutes. Remove the skillet from the heat, then add the cream and lime juice. Stir in the green onion, cilantro and remaining 1/2 teaspoon salt, and pepper. Transfer the grits to a serving platter and spoon the shrimp mixture over the top. Garnish with green onion and serve.

TC

Thank you for the great story and yummy recipes. I definitely want some garlic cheesy grits now.

I definitely want some garlic cheesy grits now. .

Lightly sprinkle the top with a little paprika before baking. Adds just a touch extra to the taste.

We always have them on Thanksgiving and Christmas. They go extremely well with traditional southern holiday food.